haha mood go brrr

https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTRyfsyWr/

aside over soliloquy

Something inside me 
used to be angry; 
I gnawed off it. 
Something to listen to
on the way to everywhere - 
nod with it. 
Some pills that
spilt over my bedside
nodding off them. 
Every now and then
I don’t hate myself,
but not often. 

Flash - 
the lightning grumbles. 
Crash -
my thoughts crumble. 
Something inside me 
remembers the toast,
shit,
I'm not with it.

salient

I listen.

It’s my job not to pay attention, but I listen.
I like to hear them laugh
and enjoy each other.
I love their stories and their snores through
a well-earned nap.

I like to hear their families say,
“Jacob turns eight this year.”
Actually,
that’s Carl you’re thinking of,
but that’s okay.

I weep inside for
their breakup’s, their hard times,
their mom’s sick.
They piece my heart back together
when they ask their
other
if they’ve eaten. They called
just to ask that and if
they could pick anything up.

Tri Cyclic

I did nothing
but watch
helpless
as the young
of my generation,
the gifted
and beautiful,
trapped themselves
in the same 
dead ends 
we hated the old
for wasting their
lives on.

I’m sorry. 

Rubber

I would have rather walked. Despite the early spring chill, I longed for a refreshing hike.

I parked, feeling the tires’ dread an inch from a small grit burn. They needn’t have gone through this existential horror except that I had so many quarters to rid myself of. 

Standing at the roadside, the long–necked animal swallowed my change. It ate eagerly, one by one, and in turn showed all that I was an honest person with no proclivity for petty crime. 

I waited for the meter to down the last coin with a metallic gulp. After it squawked happily, I climbed back behind the wheel and drove home so I could take the walk I desired instead.